Mine, of Nev.

I knew that he was dealing with things greater than he fathomed, so last year I purposed to lose the Internet and be more present in person. It was a super disturbing feeling that wouldn’t let me rest. Friendship must make count in more ways than one, no?
I remember going to visit him the next time with (of course) my 1000 troubles he was expecting to doctor through like always over the texts.

I sat on the chair by his bed from which he painfully sat up, and when he thought he’d sat comfortably enough to afford a smile, I thought… “who am I fooling? How dare I even start my ma things?”
I swerved him off my complaints. We talked about him.. His work. His next Ebifaananyi book review. About the kabaka run rant, and boy did he rant allover again! I listened like I had no extra chance tomorrow. I had none actually. It would be the occasional check ins.

Hours later, I was starting to want to leave, and another visitor was arriving. I thought that was relieving, as part of that conversation had no chance of ever being about me. I had my own dam ready to burst but I was never going to let that selfishness happen again. Not in that environment atleast…a place that clearly reminded you that Joel too had mountains.

I thanked him, again, for while we know him for the literary arts champion he was, I also know, MOSTLY, ABOVE EVERYTHING, that he unashamedly preached Salvation.
Losing one’s life to hide it in Christ. That losing one’s life would be their own gain.

I saw him in that brown box, the one he said they’d carry him in…or really the one we’ll all be eventually carried in. His face was frowned, and I thought, does his pain never end?! And then I reminded myself that it was his mortal clothing anyhow; he’d left it, and it didn’t matter anymore. He was now wearing an everlasting one. The one he couldn’t wait to wear in glory with our Lord!

He’s just been lowered to the ground. Now if I wasn’t Christian, now would be the time to know that Jesus, bestie he stood for so mightily. Because there’s people you’ve just got to see in the next life. People like Joel Benjamin Nevender.

But I am a Christian and friend he encouraged (like a million others) and had the privilege of knowing even just a bit. I will most definitely hang out with him in due time. In the meantime, I will rejoice now and my hope shall not run dry.

Thanks Nev.
1Col 3:3



On many days, I have repeated myself; told you the same story, the same words over and over again like you never heard them before because I just really wanted to keep talking to you. 

On other days, I have exploded inside with those words, pretended to tell myself my own stories because I was unable to talk to you. Because we were both sulking and broody over trivia and it’s relatives.  

On those days, I have prayed for a sooner sunset. For the sun to go down on that day and wipe it off the memory of the universe, as I awaited the innocence of the morning. 

But today, I will repeat myself; tell you the same story, the same words over and over again like you never heard them before because I just really want to keep talking to you. 

Person of mine – Day 6

Dear Person of mine,

I was staring at you the other day. Your eyes shone like they were bedazzled with tiny little diamonds. They were lovingly bright, and yet strong and firm; I felt safer than Obama. And then you smiled. Your teeth were so perfect, I don’t think I want to smile ever again because I wouldn’t make any sense. But in that moment, you looked extraordinary.

I was transfixed. I could have stayed there, in that seat all my life but then we’d starve. So then we took a walk to find some good food, and you took my hand in yours; I thought the world should end already. What more did I want? Or rather need? No…I sure need a few more things, but I got all I wanted. And all i wanted was right there taking a firm grip of my little hand. You didn’t let my hand go when we had to walk either side of a huge manhole because I had absent mindedly decided to go the other side. I thought that was really sweet.

We found some good food, and even you, felt that those chairs were uncomfortably far from each other. The table was large. So you moved yours close to mine. Close enough for us to touch shoulders each time we laughed as we shared a pizza. I caught you staring a few times, with a little smirk on your lips and I didn’t want to ask what you were thinking because it was your moment, in your mind, and I wanted it kept there for you.

We got up and left to God knows where (at that time) because we just wanted to keep walking. You could not say that goodbyes and see you laters were not your best parts of our days, but I could see it. So I let you keep taking me to God knows where. And when one rugged man tried to grab my arm, you dangerously glared at him so hard it made me smile. When usually that situation would get me raging mad. You wanted to take the long way to my taxis because it just wasn’t the time to part yet. But part we did, and I sat next to the window and watched you wait for the taxi to set off. It finally did, and you kept looking, as we sped into the distance.

I love that you are who you are. I love that you are a person of mine.
Till I see you.

Yours to keep,
Person of yours.



Two Men. – Day 3

I adore the man,
My first love
To give everything could seem enough,
But yet perfect love is immeasurable.

I love this man,
He first loved me then fixed me.
He didn’t just tell but showed
That there is more to unconditional
Than what the oxford told.

I owed this man.
Because he lost so I could win,
So i gave him my heart.
And then I won another man,
One after the other man’s heart.

This other man;
The blessing of my first love,
The knight in every armour,
Pitched camp at my castle
And re-set a rhythm some place beyond my ribcage.

This other man;
He loves with the strength of Samson,
And leads with the wisdom of Solomon.
My fear bids farewell in this perfection.
Because perfect love casts out fear.